A dependent relationship is a dysfunctional relationship in which one person is entirely responsible for and takes care of the other, without the beneficiary doing anything in return. This type of relationship forces the responsible party to completely abandon their desires and needs to fulfill the wishes of the other person. It often breeds insecurity and unhappiness, as the responsible person feels stress from the many responsibilities, while the dependent partner feels insecure for not contributing anything. In this type of relationship, there is no balanced participation. It is usually a stressful dynamic that depletes the energy and positivity of both partners. If a marriage or relationship becomes a dependency relationship, it will never be healthy or long-term. Dependence fosters negative feelings such as neediness, exploitation, control, and selfishness at the foundation of the relationship. Whether you are the responsible partner or the dependent partner, your needs and satisfaction will not be adequately addressed, and you may lose sight of your own identity. Therefore, it is important to be aware of the signs of a dependent relationship, regardless of whether you are the responsible or dependent partner.

There are two signs of a dependent relationship.

First, in case you are a responsible partner

• Giving is only on your part.
• Full responsibility for everything related to the partner and his dependence on you.
• Only you are the party that cares
• Compromises are always yours.
• Always pay the price for stability in the relationship.
• The partner does not care about your needs
• Constant criticism and dissatisfaction of the partner with you
• Unwillingness and ability to give to feel exhausted.
• Betrayal of the partner’s lack of interest or appreciation for you.
• Feeling taken advantage of by the partner or not appreciating what you are doing.

Second, if you are the dependent partner

• Your feeling of low value in the relationship and that you are below the level and contribution.
• Boredom and lack of desire for the partner and a sense of control and control from him
• The constant feeling of loneliness because there is no actual mutual participation.
• Not feeling loved by your partner and staying in emotional deprivation.
• Permanent forgiveness of the partner and acceptance of his immaturity due to the feeling of dependence.
• Not being able to say no.
• The lack of self-features and your melting in the reliance of the partner.
• Inability to express your desires and needs.
• You always feel the need to make the other party happy, even at the expense of your happiness.
• Life turns into reactions and acceptance of what the partner does, not a will.

Now here’s how to avoid a dependency relationship:

1- Distinguishing between typical desires to make those you love happy and always striving to please them

2- Respect the boundaries in the relationship and not allow manipulation or control by any partner.

3- Independence in the desires and ambitions of each party.

4- Communicate with your wants and dreams and be proactive in achieving them.

5- Acting of your own free will and responsibility towards yourself and a partner.

6- Do not tie your happiness or identity to the satisfaction of others or your ability to make them happy.

7- Don’t be defensive all the time, and don’t respond to constant criticism from your partner.

8- Distinguish the difference between participation in the relationship and dependence in the relationship.

9- Realizing that you are not responsible for the happiness of the one you love, nor is he responsible for your pleasure.

10-Respect your self-image and get out of the negative internal association with the partner.

In the end,

A healthy relationship does not consist in the exchange of interests, the exploitation of one party to the other, or selfishness and the control of one person over the other. Still, it is by showing love, respect for freedom, and a balance between happiness, independence, and positive participation.

If you are a partner in a dependency relationship or suffer from its negative impact, contact us to work together.

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